Recipe of the Month

Stuffed Acorn Squash
2 acorn squash, 10 oz. Each
1 tbsp plus 1 tsp reduced-calorie margarine
¼ c chopped onions
¼ c chopped celery
1 small, sweet apple, peeled, chopped
1 slice whole wheat bread, crumbled
1/8 tsp dried thyme
1/8 tsp ground sage
      salt & pepper to taste

Preheat oven to 375º .
Cut squash in half lengthwise. Remove seeds.
Melt margarine in a small nonstick skillet over medium heat, Add onions, celery, and apple. Cook until tender, about five minutes.
In a small bowl, combine onion mixture with remaining ingredients. Add water in small amounts until all ingredients are moistened, Spoon mixture into squash halves, mounding if necessary.
Place squash in a shallow baking pan. Pour hot water around squash to a depth of ½ inch.
Cover and bake 45 minutes, until squash is tender.

Salmon Quiche
Crust
¾ c all-purpose flour
¼ c reduced-calorie margarine
2 tbsp ice water
Filling
9 oz. drained, canned salmon, flaked
4 oz. Lowfat Swiss cheese, shredded
3 eggs, beaten
2/3 c nonfat dry milk
1-1/3 c water
1 tbsp dried chives
1 tsp sherry extract
1 tsp Dijon mustard
     salt & pepper to taste

Preheat oven to 375º.
In a medium bowl, combine all crust ingredients, mixing well to form a dough. With your hands,

work dough into a ball. Place between 2 pieces of wax paper and roll into an 11-inch circle.
Place dough in a 9-inch pie pan. Fold the edges under and flute with a fork. Prick the bottom and sides of crust with a fork about 25 times.
Arrange salmon evenly in crust. Sprinkle evenly with cheese.
In a small bowl, combine remaining ingredients. Beat with a fork or wire whisk until blended. Pour over salmon and cheese.
Bake 40 minutes, until set. Let stand 10 minutes, then serve.

World's Stupidest Criminals

On their way to a debate about exorcism in Bergen, Norway, two men dressed respectively as Jesus and the Devil apparently disturbed the peace of the local citizens in February 1987. The Devil was promptly arrested and fined, though "Jesus" went free. The Devil refused to pay the fine on the grounds that he had been discriminated against, which is where centuries of bad press gets you.
Colin Duff, of Weston-super-Mare, England was walking home from a New Year's Eve party in January 1987 when he was accosted by two "schoolgirls" in fishnet stockings, garter belts, and short dresses. While he was distracted by these attractive young ladies, two accomplices dressed as rabbits bashed him over the head with a milk bottles and stole around $15. A police spokesman said they were also hunting a gorilla who watched the assault, and remarked, :I hate to think what it would be like if we had to organize a lineup."

Darwin Awards

       Count Your Chickens  8/31/85 Egypt
Six people drowned while trying to rescue a chicken that had fallen into a well in Southern Egypt. An eighteen-year old farmer was the first to descend into the sixty-foot well. He drowned, apparently after an undercurrent in the water pulled him down. Police said his sister and two brothers,

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